Ever had to work just a bit too hard to give a bank your business?
This week I had to work a lot too hard.
You pick up the phone to your own personal business banking manager, who responds within (at the outside) a few hours, usually by phone. At worst, by personalised, confidential email.
You speak, in your desired degree of detail, about any topic relevant to your finances and your banking, with this one person (or, in his absence, his equally informed, dedicated 2IC), who is fully informed on all his bank’s products and, additionally, has the appropriate level of decision-making ability to deal with any need you might reasonably expect to ever have of your bank.
You have a significant piece of business to give a bank.
You call and explain the type of product you’re looking for and find yourself in a call centre environment. After a detailed briefing of the call centre staffer, you are transferred to another staffer, somewhere else in the bank, who either has had precious little of the previous conversation’s detail passed on or pretends that he hasn’t.
You are then passed to yet another staffer, who is even more insistent that you must take the entire conversation from the top. And is arrogant, to boot.
You give up. A day later, you receive a voicemail from someone else at the bank, referring generically to your (obviously recorded) enquiry as your desire to “open a new account”, and leaves a number for you to call back on. You call that number and it’s an operator for the bank’s “roadside rescue” call centre – who, quite clearly, has no particular incentive to help you with your enquiry for an offset and investment account.
Fed up, you lodge a complaint through the bank’s website. A day later, you receive a template email response, from a “Shelli”:
“Thank you for your feedback regarding your experience when calling our Customer Contact Centre today to open a new account.
“I am sorry to hear that you did not have a great customer experience when calling to open a new account, and we do appreciate you taking the time to let us know.
“Ms Kelly, your feedback has been passed to the Contact Centre Manager, so that they can address the issue to prevent it recurring for other customers.
“Thank you for contacting BNZ.”
“Shelli” appears to be bereft of a surname, but you give her / it / the situation the benefit of the doubt (i.e. that you’re not going to be attempting to correspond with an auto-responder series), and you email back with the question: Aren’t you even going to call me to ask me about my experience?
You receive no response. Chagrined but determined, you wait a couple of days and continue your efforts to do business with the bank.
Below is a recording of what happens next:
So . . . if you’ve listened to the recording, you’ll know who Bank A is, and you’ll also know who Bank B is.
The question, “Which bank would you choose?” hardly needs to be asked.
However, the question, “Does the CEO know?” (or care) is one that, for me, at least, remains.
I imagine that getting any form of correspondence through to his office will be something of a mission, but I’ll give it a go.
I’ll keep you posted.
PS: In case you’re wondering why I’m even talking to Bank B, unfortunately Bank A doesn’t offer the particular product I’m looking for.